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jonathandb1972

legal question - harassment

Jonathan
2 years ago

I know it’s not design related. But it is home related.

I have a friend who is harassed by her neighbour.

This evening she is hiding in her bathroom because he aggressively complained about her listening to a radio, in the garden at 8pm.
He fails all reasonable people tests but she won’t phone the police even though there is a catalogue of intimidation and harassment over the year she has lived there.

She won’t phone the police because she is worried about having to declare a dispute if she later sell.

My question is what’s the implication of me reporting this bully to the police? Will she have to declare it when she sells?

Comments (16)

  • Juliet Docherty
    2 years ago

    This happened to me about 12 years ago. I endured months of aggression from a neighbours drug addled son, he would block my car in when I had to leave for nursery and threatened my builders. I did call the police and when they eventually arrived, they suggested that off the record I kept it to myself. I came to the realisation that as these people had long term tenancy rights, they would be going nowhere, so I sold up. I never saw it as a 'you win, I lose' situation, I saw it as a mental health situation. No-one can endure such stress. I've always been very careful since to live next to nice neighbours.

  • Angie
    2 years ago

    That’s an unpleasant situation for your friend Jonathan. Do you know whether he is the homeowner or a tenant? If a tenant, it may be possible to contact the landlord, especially if a housing association. If homeowner it is harder. We have friends who had a similar situation some years back and the strain on them was terrible.
    If you report to the police there’s the possibility of something showing up on a local search. So for example I knew someone involved in a vocal and verbally aggressive domestic dispute which on the local Police force’s website showed as an incident of anti social behaviour. All there in the public domain for everyone to see.
    It’s a bit of a quandary, as selling on passes the problem to someone else, as may have happened to your friend of course. And technically it’s not just neighbour disputes which have involved the police but any unresolved dispute which should probably be reported. It may be worth talking with a solicitor to see whether there are some “softer” options.
    Sorry this isn’t really the guidance you were after. I hope things can improve for your friend soon.
    Angie

  • Jonathan
    Original Author
    2 years ago

    Thanks for taking the time to answer J.
    I also think they have a mental health issue and while I think you can have sympathy for that I don’t see why it should be tolerated. I’m of the opinion that a visit from the police could put them back in their place but I value you sharing your own experience and will reflect on whether leaving it alone is better long term.

  • Jonathan
    Original Author
    2 years ago

    Angie- thanks for taking the time to answer.

    It’s interesting you think my reporting it could turn up on a local authority search so for that reason I might consider a different approach. I’m currently thinking cattle prod.

  • Angie
    2 years ago

    Might mediation help? Although I guess that would constitute something to report. Could you have a quiet word with the chap. Before getting out the cattle prod!

  • arc3d
    2 years ago

    Peaceful resolution is always the best approach, but with some people you just have to fight fire with fire.

  • Juliet Docherty
    2 years ago

    Hi Jonanthan. I actually meant an issue with my mental health ( : The stress of having neighbours that you are actually fearful of is just not worth it. We had moved from Brighton and were renovating our house. The neighbours were very parochial and had an attitude of 'how dare you move here with your fancy ways, making the house look nice' and took every opportunity to bully us. It was personal, we don't know why, they just had it in for us. The local council were shocked and so widened the shared access (another big mistake, never again). When we sold, they never ever treated the new people the same thank goodness.

  • Jonathan
    Original Author
    2 years ago

    JD- I’m sorry they took their toll on you- you were lucky that you could eventually sell and I hope my friend can eventually do so too. Personally I have always been very lucky with neightbours with one exception who backed down the moment he realised I won’t stand for it. But for the time being she is a single woman who has to do significant work to make the property saleable- given she will have to be there for at least another year I can’t help but feel this situation needs sorting now.

  • Sonia
    2 years ago

    What an awful situation. I think your friend should seek legal advise with a solicitor or The Citizens Advice, who seem to have experience with this sort of thing. I think selling the house without declaring the nasty neighbour, even if she hasn’t involved the police, could have repercussions.

  • Jonathan
    Original Author
    2 years ago

    Thanks for the reply Sonia. It’s a tough one.

    As colourhappy has said even the most awkward people can be entirely different with the next neighbours and at the moment while it is just between the two of them the situation can be perceived as a minor disagreement.

    When disagreements become formalised through any authority such as solicitors or citizens advice I’m worried that it must then be declared upon sale which potentially devalues the property.

    I’m inclined to think my cattle prod idea is best.

  • jessa61
    2 years ago

    Oh I really feel for your friend Jonathan. It's the worst thing not feeling safe or comfortable in your own home.


    Unfortunately the law does not do enough to protect people from such situations. I too would think very carefully about making any form of complaint as you have to disclose neighbour disputes when selling. Indeed there have been situations of people being sued by their buyers for failing to disclose such information. I can't quite remember exactly what you have to declare (so please do check rather than taking this as gospel) but from memory it's definitely things like any complaints to the police or council as well as any complaints to the neighbours in writing, boundary disputes etc. It is complicated as to what you have to declare as it isn't cut and dry as any "omitted information" could be seen as giving a false declaration meaning the buyer could seek legal action against your friend. However, in reality, if there is no record of such a complaint being made, it would be very difficult to prove. Say for example the neighbour had house parties, one could say well they didn't have them when I lived there, I am a deep sleeper, I spend Saturdays at my friend's house etc and so didn't experience this issue myself.


    It's wrong really as no one should have to put up with living like this.

  • Lena
    2 years ago

    We had an issue with the next door neighbours. A small business bought a semi adjacent to us a few months after we bought ours.

    They were bringing new sets of white van drivers every few days, essentially using the house as a b&b. The noise and the amount of rubbish they produced were intolerable.

    We complained to the local council, but nothing changed. Then another neighbour took the issue up with the local councillor. The councillor encouraged the owner to sell after all.

    I didn’t see the selling price being affected in any way. He sold the house above the market price, with a substantial wear and tear from the turnover of people using it.

    I think a problem which brings in a substantial amount of stress needs to be dealt with. Life is short.

  • lspendl 828
    2 years ago

    I’m inclined to think that your initial thought of having a quiet word with the neighbour might work. Even in the playground, bullies like to target a single individual - it’s all about power. Once he sees that your friend has you by her side and fighting her corner, he may well back off without any need to involve any authorities.

  • Malcome A
    2 years ago

    Sorry to hear about your friend’s horrid situation. I probably going to say stuff that you don’t want to hear. There are some situations where I would agree with having a word with the other party, BUT when someone knows where you or in this case where she lives, I would always go pick an alternate routine.

    I understand your friend’s and others concerns about how reporting this situation will affect the saleability of her property and declaring it to potential buyers later down the line but I’m sure we would all agree that her safety and well-being is priority.

    I would say get the Police involved (but have your own evidence prior to reporting it), especially if she is living alone and having to seek refuge in her own bathroom.

    Yes the Police will make a report, but at least IF anything was to happen, the Police would have a background intel on the situation and this would lead them to grade the call as a “I” grade and respond a lot quicker. Depending on whereabouts in the country you are, there are many factors which affect the grading of calls to Police and their respond times. I think in London “I” is within 11mins. Don’t just sell it as a neighbour dispute. I would say by what your are describing it’s worse - so have some evidence before reporting it.

    My advice is to speak to your friend and go with her to report it to the Police (I’m old school and I would say go to her local station rather than reporting it online).

    I would be heavily against you/ or anyone “having a private word” with him, as he could make it look like you / her are intimidating him and being the aggressors. Get your friend to make logs of incidents (use mobile phone to record incident is great, but try to be very discreet on the first few occasions + also having the usual home security cameras like blink etc is a great deterrent). Even voice records showing how aggressive he is towards her is good evidence of a course of conduct - causing harassment, alarm or distress. - Consideration has to be made if the incident(s) takes place whilst both parties are inside their homes, but the Police will nut that out and should provide good advice.

    Hopefully with their intervention, it will stop the neighbour or at least stop your friend from living in constant fear.

  • kazzh
    2 years ago

    I would echo plusmarcus's advice. There is some thing incontrovertible about footage or audio if the matter needs to be taken further. If it were simply a matter of inconsiderate behaviour, then a discussion might have worked but I fear it has moved beyond that if your friend has spent an evening cowering in her bathroom.

    In the short term, maybe your friend could install an sos app on her phone, keeping it on her main screen so it doesn't have to be searched for, set to call either your self or in a sequence to others so you, or a few friends, can 'drop' round when the behaviour is occurring. Sometimes the entry of others breaks the trajectory of interactions. Keep a couple of packets of fancy biscuits, or a shopping bag, and a bottle of something 'celebratory', even an empty bottle recorked, so it has the appearance of a social call, so you can all move inside safely or get your friend out of the situation by leaving the property. It will require keeping a level head when entering a situation which you know has been aggressive and distressing to your friend. Ultimately, though I think the situation has escalated and warrants intervention from the police.

  • arc3d
    2 years ago

    Sorry I can't agree with the advice saying you should have panic buttons and graded calls and pretend social visits.


    No one should have to do that! What a horrible way to live in your own home.


    If the guy is aggressive then take a couple of lads with you. Sit in the garden with the radio on after 8pm.

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